"Yapper Zapper"

Homily for the Second Sunday after the Epiphany       14 January 2018
The Rev’d John R. Clarke, Rector

"You will see greater things than these.”  John 1:50

Mitch Altman is an inventor with an edge. Edge, as in that slightly cranky, cynical edge some people have. We know who we are.

That means, I admire Mitch Altman’s edge. Because one day in 2008, he had had it up to here. “When you go to a restaurant to talk with friends,” he argued, “why should you have to compete with a wall-mounted flat screen?"

So, Mitch Altman invented a key-chain-size zapper. He called it ‘TV-B-Gone.’ The pitch: Out dining and want to talk? TV in the restaurant annoying you? Zap! TV-B-Gone! And no one is any the wiser. $19.99 on Amazon.com (batteries included!). And spawning copycat apps for your smartphone, like TV-Kill and Infra-Rude. Infra-Rude. Now, that’s edge.

So, if you’re into edge, do I have a patron saint for you: Nathanael, the star of today’s Gospel.

What does Nathanael’s edge look like?

Prickly. When we first meet Nathanael, he’s idling away the mid-day hours under a shady fig-tree. Bulldozing the reverie, his friend Philip runs up with breaking news: “We have found the Messiah! Jesus of Nazareth.”

I mean, this is big. This is the scoop of all time!

What’s Nathanael’s response? In what has the ring of a pop saying — a pop saying oozing red-meat, tee-shirt meme bias — Nathanael cranks, “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?”

Zap! Jesus-B-Gone! It appears that, to people like Nathanael, Nazareth isn’t exactly Harvard Yard.

That’s because of competition — competition for resources, trade, and market share waged by Bethsaida (Nathanael’s hometown) and within-spitting-distance Nazareth, where Philip’s “Messiah” hails from.

But I think there’s more than hometown rah-rah-rah to Nathanael’s put-down, something more insidious going on here: snark with racist overtones. That’s because Bethsaida — with a substantial, commerce-oriented Greek-speaking population — may have been a bit more upscale than not-our-kind-dear Nazareth.

A note: I’m using “racism” here in the more expansive, popular sense beyond (but including) skin color. Racism as singling out a particular ethnic, racial, sexual orientation, or religious population for suspicion. Using the term to span, let’s say, anything from Black Lives Matter to anti-gay discrimination … from gender-pay inequality to #metoo.

And then there’s this: Highlighting what comes off as racism in Nathanael’s reaction is more faithful to John’s Gospel than treating it as an off-the-cuff remark, as some do. Because, at his best, John shows his love for the dramatic — the dramatic tension between two protagonists. Examples: Jesus’ debate with Nicodemus. Or the tension between Jesus and his menacing critics ginning-up the events of Holy Week.

But in this instance, John uses Philip’s response as counterpoint to Nathanael’s bias.

That’s because, to Philip’s blockbuster news (“We have found the Messiah!”), Nathanael might have said, “Aw, all Nazarites are lepers” … echoes of a rank bigot’s recent fabrication: “All Haitians have AIDS.”

Or he could have popped off with: “Once you invite Nigerians — I mean, the natives — out of Nazareth, they’ll never go back to their huts.” Sounds as fresh as a few news cycles ago.

But Nathanael cranked up the volume with: “How could any decent human being — let alone the Messiah — come from a bleep-hole like Nazareth?”

Toxic.

Philip’s comeback? He doesn’t laugh. He doesn’t let the comment pass with a “whatever” shrug. He names Nathanael’s racism with the challenge that has been the undoing of hooded and un-hooded bigots since time immemorial. “Come and see.” Read: “You’ve shot off your mouth. Feel better? Now do your homework.”

And before you know it, Nathanael’s derision will butt heads with Jesus’ defiant blend of politics, religion, and entertainment.

Yes, entertainment.

That’s because, no sooner do the duo set out, than Jesus himself intercepts them. Sizing up Nathanael’s full-tilt body language, Jesus gushes, “Here is truly an Israelite in whom there is no deceit.” In others words, “Get a load of a real straight-shooter!”

Well, it’s a bull’s eye. Disarming, even. But then Nathanael’s edge kicks in. “Hey, how do you know me?”

Jesus goes all-in Vegas. “With my x-ray vision, I saw you in the shade of the fig tree even before Philip called you.”

Well, against all odds, Nathanael is really impressed. In fact, Jesus wins him over to such a degree that Nathanael blurts out bing-bing-bing, “You’re a rabbi! You’re the Son of God! You’re the King of Israel!”

“Wowed by that old carnie trick I do?” Jesus breezes. “Stick around. You’ll see even greater things!”

Triggering the question: If the clairvoyance act is just a teaser, what “greater things” is Jesus talking about?

More than parlor tricks: Trading in Nathanael’s big mouth for big justice.

Read: Everything to do with dismantling Nathanael’s racism — racism to which, as we ourselves are proof, he doesn’t hold the patent.

Take tired — and tiresome — canards we’re all familiar with and, occasionally, hawk ourselves:

“Black people can’t handle dope.” In the absence of facts — actually contravening the data — a Kansas state legislator let fly with that zinger last Monday. Marijuana, which he erroneously labeled a gateway drug, should remain illegal in Kansas because African Americans, he said, are predisposed to get high. It’s their “character makeup” and “genetics,” he claimed. Falsely.

Here’s another one: “Most Mexican immigrants are criminals, rapists, and drug dealers.” We heard that whopper in the last presidential election … along with — from the same then-candidate, who also stands accused of multiple sexual assaults — the boast that women court sexual assault. Ripe for the plucking.

Or, transgender persons aren’t fit for front-line combat.

Or, most Muslims are terrorists.

All sentiments expressed by folks who fear that the country will become blacker … or browner … or gayer … or gender-equal … or more different … or less evangelical.

Light years from Jesus’ promise of “greater things” that Nathanael — and each of us — can look forward to witnessing and cloning. And what are they? Jesus’ actions that will take on any bumpersticker hucksterism that lords “We’re First” over any one of our neighbors.

To go, then, from what those “greater things” aren’t … to what they might look like, remember Oprah Winfrey’s Golden Globe speech last Sunday?

First, a disclaimer: A handful might claim otherwise, but Oprah Winfrey is not Jesus. And I’m not sure — yet — she should be president. Not sure she should even run. But I was struck by Slate.com Dahlia Lithwick’s response to Oprah’s speech:

This was a speech about how seeing someone else model the fight against racism, sexism, and injustice activates us to fight alongside.

It was a testament to the ability to shed light on the faceless and speak of justice and morality in ways that are urgent and original.

On Sunday night, we heard Winfrey urge invisible people to speak up … become engaged … transform policy … and find their own power … by moving from passivity and acceptance … to furious, mobilized participation and a call for allies in that fight.

Can anything great come from a speech like that?

Can anything great come from its predecessor: Jesus’ call to Nathanael … Jesus’ quit-sitting-on-the-sidelines-and-follow-me call to each of us?

Depends. If “great” means laying aside any and all notions of “We’re First” … if it means racism, be gone? Then, yes. Absolutely. Absolutely greater things!

Amen.